Becky's Blog


1.31.2009 | Blog, Quotes, Sex in the Media

Ted Haggard BUY NEXIUM NO PRESCRIPTION, As a clinical sexologist, I had a particular interest in watching Ted Haggard in his many media appearances this week and the conversation it has sparked among many. Purchase NEXIUM for sale, From his interview on Oprah, Ted Haggard seems to understand that human sexuality is complex, NEXIUM no rx. Is NEXIUM addictive, He said this several times. He also said that he didn't want to be pigeon-holed into either a "homosexual" or a "heterosexual" category, NEXIUM alternatives, Where can i find NEXIUM online, although it seems that everyone (on both sides of the debate) is trying to do just that.

What was missing from the conversation was the awareness that sexual orientation exists on a spectrum, NEXIUM mg. Between the polarizing categories of "gay" and "straight," there is a diversity of experiences and orientations, BUY NEXIUM NO PRESCRIPTION. NEXIUM class, Intuitively, I think we understand this, low dose NEXIUM, Where can i buy cheapest NEXIUM online, yet our culture loves to categorize people into easily-definable boxes.

In his ground-breaking 1948 book Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, order NEXIUM online c.o.d, NEXIUM reviews, Alfred Kinsey wrote:

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Kinsey, after painstakingly interviewing over 12,000 men,  devised a seven-point scale to reflect the spectrum of sexual experience:


0- Exclusively heterosexual with no homosexual
1- Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual
2- Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual
3- Equally heterosexual and homosexual
4- Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual
5- Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual
6- Exclusively homosexual
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From my limited interaction with Ted Haggard's story, NEXIUM photos, NEXIUM without a prescription, it sounds to me like he has reached a place of understanding about his own sexuality and grasped this basic concept that many, gay and straight (including Oprah Winfrey), NEXIUM recreational, NEXIUM pictures, have not seemed to grasp — that there are more than two categories of human sexual experience.


Becky Knight, MPH

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Thanks for your article. Do you think part of why people are quick to assign a sexual orientation to Ted (discounting his “nuanced” understanding) is that he has a history of lying and presenting an image? It’s very hard to take his word for his experiences when he has been a master of deception (perhaps even deceiving himself). Consequently, I think people looking on feel the need to say: Come on Ted. Why such a struggle to manage the labels? Come clean.

And perhaps he just has. It’s simply hard to know.


it sounds to me like he has reached a place of understanding about his own sexuality

What’s so sad about that is that it took him so long to come to that realization, and he had to endure the public humiliation he did before he got there.

That, and there’s no telling how much damage he did to others through his preaching against acceptance of one’s sexual orientation.


Becky – My husband and I were just talking about this tonight (we atched the documentary and interview Thursday night). Neither of us are professionals but it seemed obvious to us that Haggard did not fall simply into one category or the other and were impressed that he did not let people bully him into claiming one. Julie – I think people are trying to get him to claim a category because of their own personal perspectives. It may be because someone is sick of being told they can change or because of some phobia they have or because they want to promote a particular view – they may not even be aware of why they want to insist they are sure about his orientation. I do however think it is awful presumptious of anyone to say “they know” what his sexual orientation is. I was all prepared to dislike him when I watched the shows but I ended up believing that he is sincerly trying to work through his situation honestly. He came off as kind, humble, repentant (about his lying and deceit) and genuine. I am hoping that God will use him to change some things.


people like to pigeon hole each other because our entire public discourse in this country is now completely dominated by “identity politics”.
we have politics for straight people. we have politics for gay people. we don’t have politics for people who are a Kinsey 2 or for people who are a 4 on weekends but a 1 during the week.
we use pigeon hole identities to avoid the work of getting to know someone before jumping to the conclusion of whether or not we will agree with them politically or disagree with them. and this matters to us a great deal because we have become a culture where people refuse to associate with anyone they do not agree with – mostly because if they ever got “caught” with the enemy they would lose all credibility amongst their compatriots.

which is of course exactly what has happened to Mr. Haggard. he was outed as a goat amongst sheep and so his flock’s entire concept of who he is, and thus -how he thinks- is completely altered without him having said a word to give this impression.

Existential Punk

Great article and good stuff to chew on. i LOVED the Kinsey film. i think the problem with Haggard is religious fundamentalism has kept him in bondage to freely exploring his sexuality, wherever he falls on the continuum. i don’t want to label him, but i do want him to come out of denial so he can find freedom.

Warm Regards,


Becky Knight

Thanks EP. I value your perspective.

I agree that fundamentalism often has negative influences on sexuality. I am planning to write a future blog post that will address that in more detail. In reality, I could write a whole book on that subject.

Regarding Ted’s denial, he did admit that he still has attraction to men. What, in your opinion, is he in denial about?

Existential Punk


i guess i did not see the interview so i did not know he said that. Yet, he is in denial that he cannot be a Christian and be attracted to men. This is where his fundamentalism keeps him in bondage. It did for me for way too many years! i pray he comes to peace with himself and with G-D no matter what. i think denying aspects of one’s sexuality because of religion only hurts you and those involved with you, i.e. spouses and children. Look at Ray Boltz, who finally came out a few years ago after years of denying and repressing his attractions to men. His wife/ex-wife, CArol Boltz, blogs about her experiences. She is a fierce advocate of the LGBTQ community and Queer Christians in particular.

Thanks for the conversation!

Warm Regards,


Peter Carino

Nice post. I’ve always held (both through experience and intuitively) that hetero/homo is on a continuum. I wonder if the fundamentalism in the gay community (that one is either gay or not) was initially a reaction against those who though sexual orientation was a choice and therefore could be “fixed”. From what I saw of the Oprah interview, she seems to be pretty fundamentalist on this issue. Haggard seems to illustrate that human sexuality is very plastic: both experience and choice will affect desire. The underlying desire for communion with another person does not change, but the manner in which one goes about attempting to achieve that can and does.

Becky Knight

EP – Thank you for the link to Carol Boltz. I will be interested to get more acquainted with her perspective.

I feel for Ted and others who believe that their religious beliefs and their sexuality are in conflict. That is true for other sexual issues as well, not just regarding homosexuality. One of the issues that I help women with is painful sex, or vaginismus, which often results from growing up in a very conservative/fundamentalist family and community. Fundamentalism can affect people’s ability to embrace their heterosexuality too.

I agree with you, and hope that Ted finds peace.

Becky Knight

I was prepared to groan all through the Oprah show, but I too found Ted and Gayle sincere. Whatever the future holds for them, I am impressed that they seem to be trying to find honest answers. We all have biases and beliefs that cloud our judgment.

Becky Knight

Julie, I do think that people react strongly to any type of hypocrisy. Perhaps his resistance to accepting a label leads people to suspect he is still “dodging the question.”


As you said, many of us sense this intuitively – esp. those of us happily married heterosexuals with vibrant sex lives who do not fall so stringently on a polar extreme…thank you for such a great concise post :)

[...] Living Sexuality sexual orientation exists on a spectrum. Between the polarizing categories of “gay” and “straight,” there is a diversity of experiences and orientations. Intuitively, I think we understand this, yet our culture loves to categorize people into easily-definable boxes…. [...]

cathryn Thomas

Hey Becky…
I’ve gotten to know Steve some online and thru CoHorts… so it’s a pleasure to get to know you too.. (wish we could have touched when i was in NC)
Wanted to give a big Kudos and shout on even stepping into this one.. I have some thoughts on a lot, since i’m a Physical Therapist Assistant and a Massage and Bodyworker- and tend to work with people that have gone thru trauma… (broad spectrum there) Plus also do pelvic floor work with those who have medical and (well, not so medical- cuz the root source of ideopathic pain often is sourced in other areas, primarily emotional and the like)- so some of what i know.. is coloured by that.. but would love to speak some time .. and touch in per say on some of this.. I’ll add you to the blog rolls on LoveFiercely…
Oh, could you elaborate on Kinsey’s finding a tad.. sorry the graph confused me a bit.. or if there is a link on some of his stuff.. i’d love to read it…
Ok, pinch your hubby for me and sending mucho shalom and Ahava from Austin Texas!


Hey Becky, I was thinking about the book The Bisexual Option when I was watching Ted Haggard do his rounds this week. Good for him that he didn’t let the church or the media label him. I just wish he would ditch the hetero with homo attachments and hetero with issue rhetoric. I know it’s a journey, but these phrases aren’t anymore helpful in my opinion.

Becky Knight

Cathryn, I didn’t know you did physical therapy and bodywork! We have lots to talk about. I am beginning to work more with women with painful sex issues and we often refer them to Physical Therapy. I will email you about a Painful Sex Assessment that I helped to develop.

As for the Kinsey stuff, I will see if I can post more soon.

cathryn Thomas

Cool beans…. that would rock! Lets touch in….. LOL i’ve always seen such a tender Father heart in Steve.. doesn’t surprise me in the least that God would hook you two up…. gives me a big heart smile! my phone numbers and such are on my facebook info page.. which you have access. or…… you’ve got my private email that i put on my info section when i posted….. so don’t hesitate to use it…. LOL i was for years one of three people that worked pelvic floor stuff in NC…..
glad that’s changed some… but.. not the most popular areas to work in… so it’s got it’s shadows…. as you would KNOW!!! Love to look at the Painful Sex Assessment…….. (doesn’t that sound funny in print.. ROFL) – but would love to take a gander… perhaps i could add … or even better LEARN! get in touch… would love to hear your voice. Blessings dear one!

[...] my being a bisexual — wholly living into the idea that Alfred Kinsey talks about (below, ht Becky Knight) — can offer something to the wider church about the beauty of the Spirit, the beauty of [...]

Thanks for your article. Do you think part of why people are quick to assign a sexual orientation to Ted (discounting his “nuanced” understanding) is that he has a history of lying and presenting an image? It’s very hard to take his word for his experiences when he has been a master of deception (perhaps even deceiving himself). Consequently, I think people looking on feel the need to say: Come on Ted. Why such a struggle to manage the labels? Come clean.

And perhaps he just has. It’s simply hard to know.

Posted by: Julie | January 31st, 2009 01:31

Come clean to what?
What they want him to be?

You see, this is a political fight. Never forget that. Many gay “activists” play fast and loose with the Kinsey Scale (which has problems of its own if you go beyond “that sounds reasonable”).

When they want to grow the numbers of gays and lesbians many will trump the Kinsey Scale to imply that true heterosexuality is way out on the edge and everybody has a little bit of gay in them. Then they trump Kinsey’s “gay estimation” (it wasn’t really) at 10% to get the largest estimates out of any research.
Many are quick to parlay homo-eroticism into something larger than itself (guys who you fooled around with in middle school and who no longer do so “are in denial” for example); convinced that many could be “persuaded” to be “open” and “free” about their sexuality.

But when they want to attack people who they label “homophobes” they are quick to throw away the scale and label their opponents “gays in denial”. Not bisexual. Not “75% straight”. Gay.

Ted Haggard has a right to define himself however he wishes. He does not have to call himself gay or define himself by his sexual feelings.
The man has 5 children with his wife. Something had to be working right.

[...] her Living Sexuality blog, clinical sexologist, Becky Knight, picks apart fallen Christian evangelical Ted Haggard’s recent Oprah interview. Haggard, you will recall, [...]

Living Sexuality

[...] I was writing my previous post about Ted Haggard, I was wondering what Joe Kort was going to say on the matter. Joe is the author of Straight Guise, [...]